With Isis Around There is No World Peace!

Execution of Christians 

Though most of my blogs are about gaming, the reality of it is I am not a sqeeker, in fact I'm in my 30's and I find the older you get the more you pay attention to current events. The reason I made the blog wasn't only to help out gamers but also to blog about different things in life that matter. Things that the average person would want to read and not just a gamer. As a gamer, it's scary that some of the stuff that you see in a game, is actually happening in real life. It may not be in the US but it's in other parts of the world. Honestly I can't wrap my head around most of it. I don't understand how a human can be so evil.

    So, here I am today writing about Isis (The Islamic State Caliphate) I am not writing about it to discuss conspiracy theories, to blame which president is responsible for these savages, as I know a lot of people like to blame bush or Obama. Some people don't even believe this is actually happening, and that it's set up somewhere in hollywood to fool the American People. But me writing about conspiracy theories would be a whole different blog. Just like there is extremism in terrorism there is also extremism in conspiracy, not to say that some of those theories may actually be true.  I'm not here to argue whether different theories are true or false. I'm just here to help people understand what is going on in the world. Most people have put their heads in the sand when it comes to this subject. I mean who wants to wake up in the morning to reports of someone's head being shopped off, or someone being burnt alive, or drowned in a cage? I know I don't. However burying our heads in the sand isn't going to help us nor the people in the middle East. All we are doing is prolonging the inevitable. The fact of the matter is that they hate Westerners and they will find a way to terrorize us. They want to instill fear in us, so they haunt us on the internet, they send out their video's and the most scary part of all is they are here. They are also wherever you are. They want to take over the world, and they will not sleep until either the world comes together and defeats them, or they defeat us. That is the scary thing, they are not afraid of death, they love death so really nothing will stop them except for maybe some bullets dipped in bacon grease, or some women with guns.

Islamic State 

 So the next question is who is Isis or Isil? Well they are a group of extreme Muslims. that take the koran literally. They do not leave room for interpretation. They believe in Allah, and they believe that everything the Prophet Mohammad said and did is what they are going to live their life by. I am no pro at the muslim religion. I know a little bit about it, but I'm not going to pretend to know everything. I'm not even going to say that Isis represent Islam, that is not for me to say. It would be ignorant of me to say that that is the case, but like every religion there are people who take these things to the extreme. It just seems to me that Islam is the one religion always killing. (That's the extremist of course not all of them) In any case the Caliphate is from the middle East. They have taken over parts of Iraq and Syria. If you live in the state of the Caliphate you live by Sharia law. Sharia law is basically the law of the Koran.  It's convert or die when you live in the Islamic State. If you don't have the same beliefs as ISIS, you have a few options you can up and leave everything, you can chose to be executed, or you can pay "Jizya" a minority tax which basically just allows you to live, but once you leave your house you are still under Sharia law and if you break Sharia law you die, and they mark your house so that everyone knows that a Christian or non muslim lives at that resident. Does this sound familiar?  The mark of the Jew back in WWII thats what I often think about, when I read about this. In order to make sure there are no outsiders spying on them giving outsiders information the Caliphate has restricted internet use, people who come in usually do not come out, and nobody is allowed to leave, if they want to leave the area they have to go to some kind of court getting special permission to leave. The Caliphate has also made sure that people inside don't turn on them by killing people who worked in the government before they took over. If they didn't kill them they have to carry a piece of paper that is basically a redemption paper saying that they will obey the Sharia law and they have asked for forgiveness for there "sin" of working for the government. So basically what the Caliphate is doing is nothing but pure genocide convert or die. History is indeed repeating itself, and unfortunately it's in our life time.

Caliphate Cubs executing army

     Under Sharia law if you steal they cut off your hand, if your gay they throw you off the top of a building, it is punishable by death. If you cheat on your spouse they stone you to death, if your a spy they behead you or execute you. If your a prisoner of war, they torture you, they have mock executions. Women are not allowed to leave their house without their husband or a male relative, men can have several wives however women can only have one husband. They are not allowed to show any skin. If they show skin they are punished by whatever the caliphate feels fit. It could be lashes, stoning, acid to the face or even death. Executions are public. They have been known to behead even children and leave there heads on stakes for everyone to see. They have been known to crucify people and leave their corpse up for several days. The community is forced to come out and watch it's not optional. They have taken refugees from cities that they have taken over, sold the women as slaves, killed the men, taken the boys to be caliphate cubs. (Caliphate cubs are the boys who learn about Isis and they are trained to kill at as young as 5.) The boys are told to cut off their mothers heads because their mom's are infidels and they are the enemy. So, now you have little kids being taught to hate, and kill before their lives have even started. These guys are heartless evil savages and they need to be dealt with. The world needs to unite like then did in WWII and get rid of these guys. This is not going away, their goal is to take over the world. They have taken over already a big chunk of Iraq and Syria. Major cities, they have taken over oil and military basis, they have even taken over a American Embassy.

  For those of you who are not up on current events, your probably wondering what the middle east has to do with you? Why should you care? You don't live in Iraq, or Syria - you live in the West and the odds of being involved in a Terrorist attack is small so who cares? There is no Sharia law where you live right? WRONG! Heres a little timeline for you, and forgive me I'm using pictures, and obviously they are not my own. I am not claiming rights on them. I am pulling offline, but I want people to understand how scary this really is. I have spent hours researching ISIS since last Summer when they first started decaping there prisoners. Let me tell you, I have read some of their twitter accounts and these guys are sick and twisted, you need to be worried about your Country wherever you are and your family. This problem is not going away, it's not going away until they are defeated, as I stated before in order to do that this world is going to have to unite, even if it is only for this one thing. That's right enemies are going to have to put their differences aside for this one purpose and work together.

April 8th, 2013 ISI (Islamic State of Iraq) expanded into Syria creating ISIS (Islamic State of Syria)
June 9th, 2014 ISIS took over Mosul
August 19, 2014 - James Foley a American Journalist was beheaded in the middle east
September 2, 2014 - Steven Sotloff a american Journalist was beheaded in the middle east
September 13, 2014 - David Haines a British aid worker was beheaded in the middle east
September 19, 2014 - John Cantlie a British Journalist starts making propaganda videos
October 3, 2014 - Alan Henning a minicab driver decapitated in the middle east
November 16, 2014 - Peter Kassig a Britsh humanitarian decapitated in the middle east.
January 2, 2015 -Haruna Yukawa - Japanese man decapitated in the middle east
January 31, 2015 - Kenji Goto a Japanese Journalist decapitated in the middle east
February 15,2015 - Isis killed 21 Coptic Egyptians threatening all Christians in a video
February 3, 2015 - Mu'ath al-Kaseasbeh Jordan Airforce Pilot burnt alive in a cage in the middle east
April 19, 2015 - Isis killed 30 Ethiopian Christians in Libya
April 12, 2015 - Tomislav Salopek - a Croatia man decapitated in Egypt
August 18, 2015 - Khaled Al-Asaad - Syrian Archeologist was decapitated in Syria

  I know what your thinking, okay this is all in the middle east so what does that have to do with my country or me? Well these executions had hostages from many countries which is a act of war. Yes it happened overseas, however ISIS later sent out a video calling for lone wolf attack on the Countries of the west. As if that was not enough they also started recruiting for people to join the Islamic State via websites and twitter accounts. Shockingly enough thousands of foreigners joined from many Western Countries. They even had women moving to Syria traveling through Turkey to be Isis wives, even though women there have no rights. They even used kittens and Nutella to bribe these Isis wives and it worked. This is about when the Cybercaliphate became affective on the web. Now not only did it become a religious war but it also became a cyber war. They communicated and still communicate through youtube and twitter. It is painfully easy to find someone in ISIS on twitter and watch conversations happen in real time.

ISIS invading your Country or a Country near you!

Lindt Cafe Siege (Sydney, Australia)

  December 16.2014 - The Sydney under siege hostage crisis (Sydney, Australia) This was the very moment most people realized that the Terrorist were coming to us. We realized that we were no longer safe in our own Country and that we had a serious problem on our hands. I mean, I have never heard of Australia being combative. I've always thought that Australia stayed to themselves and never wanted any trouble. But they have Western beliefs therefor they are the enemy to Isis. So quick history lesson for those of you who have not heard about this. A man. I use that word loosely cause he was a coward  walked into a Lidnt Cafe and held a bunch of people hostage. It was Christmas time so the Cafe was full, not to mention that it is a famous cafe in Australia. This particular Cafe was right next to a broadcast station, so it had perfect news coverage. Some believe that's why the Lone Wolf picked this place to stand up. This terrorist lined the hostages with their hands up around all the windows holding up a Isis flag He held these poor victims hostage for 16 hours, before there was a gun fight and the Police were able to get the majority of the hostages out. Two hostages died, and the gunman all in the name of Allah.

   

Charlie Hebdo (Paris, France) 

  January 7, 2015 - Charlie Hebdo Shooting - (Paris, France) Two Terrorist forced their way into a newspaper business, killed 11 people and injured 11 others. Also killed a French police officer on their way out of the massacre.  There were several other attacks in France following this attack including a Kosher store, all together another 11 people killed. Who would do this? Al-Quada, Yemen. Not Isis, I know but Isis is actually a branch off of Al - Quada, except even there Doctrine is so intense that Al-Quada really has nothing to do with Isis. But never the less it's a terror attack, and didn't all this come from 9/11 New York? Wasn't that when the world first new what we were dealing with? Why would they do something so horrible? Well, it's because Charlie Hebdo was known for drawing pictures and making fun of religion and their figures. This of course included Mohammad. In the Islam religion a drawing of Mohammad is.. well, punishable by death. So the terrorist killed Charlie Hebdo and his staff. Charlie Hebdo didn't just draw just Mohammad but also Buda and Jesus and he made fun of them all. Morally right, no not at all but I really don't think he and his staff should have died for it.

  October 22, 2014 - Parliament Hill Shooting (Ottawa, Canada) a ISIS terrorist walked in and killed a soldier and injured 3 by shooting them. He was in return shot 31 times by the Canadian Police. Isis claimed the attack.

 May 4, 2015 - Mohammad drawing contest (Texas, United States) In support of Charlie Hebdo Pamela Geller decided it would be good to have a drawing contest of Mohammad in Texas. Knowing how controversial it was, they decided to have very high security, just in case they were attacked by terrorist. It's a good thing they did because the two gunman planned on storming in and killing people at this contest, however they're luck wasn't good at all the only two people who died where the terrorist. The Texan Police did their job and killed them before they could injure anyone.

 October 31, 2015  - A Russian plane with around 120 passengers crashed, after investigating it was found that a bomb went off in the airplane and on November 4, 2015 Isis released a video stating that they are the ones responsible for the Russian plane coming down.

November 13, 2014 - Paris, France 3 teams of ISIS joined up together and planned a massive attack on Paris, France. They planned 6 attacks at 6 different places to take place at the exact same time. This is the worst attack in France's history. 128 people dead all for... you guessed it the name of Allah. To instill fear in everyone who doesn't believe in what these terrorist believe in. They have waged war against the Kuffar (The infidels) They wanted the world to see what they are capable of. The world stood in shock as it was all going on. Everyone praying that their loved ones in Paris were okay. If anyone thinks that this can not happen to their country they are crazy. Now that Isis has succeeded on their biggest terror attack in a different Countries land. They know they can do it anywhere. They've already said London, Rome, Philippines, and the US is next. As much as I hate to admit it, I believe it can very well happen where ever you are reading this.

 As you can see ISIS has taken on the world, I didn't even talk about the beheadingings in the United States, or the Machette attacks in both New York and London, or even the car bombs that have gone off in Lebanon, Iraq, London, and every other place where they have hit. What about Africa? Boko Horam  where they have pledged to Isis and have done just as many terror attacks throughout Africa? I can list dates for each attack they have done world wide but it would take me forever, and frankly this blog is long enough. I think you guys get the point.

 Unfortunately, even though war is ugly, and lots of people die, innocent people die during war, the world is going to have to come together and take care of this cancer of the world. They are not going to stop. They take joy in beheading and killing people. They genuinly believe that they are supposed to cleanse the world of non believers. There are people from all over the world going to them for training and joining the caliphate and then returning to their Countries. It is said that all 50 states have people under investigation for being part of ISIS. As of right now there are possible at least a thousand people in the United States alone that is part of ISIS and is just waiting for the green light.

Every Country no matter what they are or where they are have one thing in common, humanity. We all our human, we may have different cultures but we all have loved ones. We all love our Countries, we all have our beliefs. We all have our hobbies, jobs, schools. We're all human, we all live and we all die. We, the human race need to unite, even if it is just for this one thing. Our world leaders need to come up with a solid plan, a solid aggressive plan and eliminate ISIS. So, that our children can grow up in peace. Until we do that lot's more blood will be spilled, and every continent will be harmed. There will be lot's of innocent blood shed.

 We can continue to bury our heads in the sand and act like it is not a big deal cause it hasn't happened to us, but this will continue and grow. It will spread into your Country and to the Countries surrounding you.That is their plan, they've been very vocal about it. Or we can all step up and take our Countries back and protect our loved ones.


Notice - All of the pictures were taken off of google they are not my own.

Xurday 11-13-15 my feelings on how the game has changed.

The Agent of the nine is here, and what did he bring us another week of disappointment. Not sure about you guys, but I look forward to xur for one reason. A chance to get a new item that I don't already have, a chance to get my hands on a year 2 gun that I don't have. Time refill on the heavy ammo and three of coins.

 This blog is not going to go into detail like I normally do for each individual item xur is selling. Feel free to watch the video above if you want to know what xur has today. Today my blog is going to be more on how I am feeling about the game and about xur.

Ok, so here's my thoughts on Destiny lately, I used to play destiny 8 hours a day and I would even stream on twitch. But I have since stopped streaming and stopped playing destiny more than a few hours a day. Lately the game itself has kind of seemed tedious at best. It used to be you run a strike or night fall and have a good chance of getting something you wanted. Yes, running the same strike on heroic 3 times did get old. But at the end you knew that you would get 9 strange coins if you took the hardest mode. Running then nightfall? Well there was always the challenge where you couldn't wipe or you had to start all over, but you knew you may get that one weapon you really wanted at the end, or at the very least you would get a bunch of strange coins.

The new Destiny - The taken king - Well, let me first start off by saying I really enjoyed the taken king when it first came out. The graphics, the new stories, not a big fan of the raid, but that is mainly cause  I suck at jumping and there is a lot of jumping in the raid. I think if it wasn't for that I would have really enjoyed the raid as well. The raid is pretty awesome. But then after I finished everything, here came the boredom. It seems like destiny has become farming the majority of the time. Waiting for the Taken, trying to find fragments. You run heroic strikes, well you have to run 3 of them to get your 15 legendary marks, with really no guarantee of anything else, of course you can eat a 3 of coins but still no guarantee. Then there is the nightfalls - you go through it and once again no guarantee. It has become disappointing.

And finally there is xur the agent of the nine #tentacle face. I used to wait up all night, before making video's just to see if he was selling that gun I really wanted, or maybe that armor I really wanted. But now there are weeks that xur doesn't even sell a gun such as this week. Really Bungie? I really think your losing your way in this game. The gamers want guns and armor. I am not going to spend 23 coins on a engram. I might as well spend 23 coins on a exotic shard, and back in the day it was on 7 strange coins for a exotic shard. I really think bungie needs to make the game a little less tedious and more rewarding. If your going to make it tedious to the point it's almost a job to play the game at least give us better rewards, or have xur supply better things. I am more likely to spend more time grinding in the game if I know I at least have a good chance of getting something I want. People are more likely to look forward to xur if they at least know for sure he has a year 2 weapon. So, Bungie has made some good changes to the game but they also have made changes that are not so good.

So, that is my feelings on destiny as of right now. I'm a big fan of destiny, I am a year one player I'm not trying to say Destiny sucks cause it doesn't. I just feel that every time bungie tries to improve the game they make some changes that make the game less appealing, at least to year one players. They need to figure out a way to keep the game appealing to those of us who have been around since the beginning.

 If you enjoyed my blog please be sure to follow it, I do post xur stuff every week, and sometimes political or personal stuff. Also please be sure to help me out and follow my youtube channel, and watch the video. I'm trying to get the channel going and can't do it without you, the viewer!

What will Xur bring today? 11-6-15

  So, last week Xur actually made a lot of people happy, so as I wait for xur to come in 10 min I am wondering what he may have. I can almost guarantee that there will not be a year 2 weapon. You will have the year one weapon engram which I must advise you don't waste your coins on. It's 31 coins for a old weapon, I have to say Bungee what are you thinking? Why on earth would someone spend 31 strange coins (Coins that are now harder to get) on a year one item? Come on Bungee you can do better than that.

                                       Xur is located in the North Tower by the Speaker

   

Helm of inmost light (Titan helmet year 2) Requires level 40 w/280 defense 

*Intellect 62/77

*Gain death from above head strong 

*Gain bonus super energy on grenade kills 

*Gain bonus melee energy on orb pick ups 

Cost 13 strange coins 

ability to infuse and use twist of fate 

Celestial Nighthawk (Hunter helmet year 2) Requires level 40 w/280 defense 

*Intellect 31/46

*Strength 36/51

*Golden gun fires one shot with 6times damage, while granting keyhole for over penetration

*Gains bonus super energy on grenade kills 

*Replenish health when you pick up an orb

Cost 13 strange coins 

Option to infuse and use twist of fate as well 

The Impossible Machines NEW (warlock Gauntlets) requires level 40 w/280 defense

*Intellect 30/43

*Defense 31/44

*Grants landfall 

*Increased melee attack speed 

*Increased reload speed with scout rifles 

Cost 13 strange coins 

Option to infuse and use twist of fate 

Exotic engram is a Helmet this week 19 strange coins 

Legacy Engram is a do not buy (Year 1 weapon) for 31 strange coins 

All the information given above is directly off my playstation and not in my own words, except for the part about the legacy engram.  :-) 

Please be sure to subscribe to my youtube video and blog for up to date information on Xur.

Every Friday is a Happy or not so happy Xur day 10-30-15

Xur certainly didn't disappoint today, Everything is new from year 2 This is what he has but first of all let's start with where he is located. He is located over by the crucible guys this week.

And this is what Xur has

The Taikonaut Helmet New yr 2 (Titan) Requires level 40 w/280 defense

Intellect 36/51

Discipline 31/46

*All rocket launchers gain tracking. Visible radar while zooming with heavy weapons. Heavy ammo drops more often

*More super energy from non-gaurdian kills 

*Bonus Grenade energy on Orb pick up

13 Strange Coins 

Gravitation Forfeit Helmet New year 2 (Hunter) Requires level 40 w/280 defense 

Intellect 36/51

Strength 36/51

*Grants Shadestep

*Gain bonus super energy on grenade kills 

*Shields start recovery immediately after orb pickup

13 strange coins 

Alchemist's Raiment Chest piece New yr 2 (Warlock) Requires level 40 w/280 defense

Intellect 87/107

*Chance to gain glimmer on Primary ammo pick up with full super, orbs recharge grenade and melee

* Reduces incoming arc burn damage 

*Carry more ammo for special weapons

13 Strange coins 

Zhalo Supercell auto Rifle with Arc Burn 

*Arc projectiles have the chance to chain lighting when enemies are close together 

*Double kills with this weapon charge a small amount o super energy and return ammo to the magazine

*This weapon grows more accurate the longer it is fired 

23 Strange coins (A must buy) 

The description of the weapons are not my own words but taken from my playstation and xur directly.

  

Xur 10-23-15

Where is xur this morning? Well, good news I have the information ready for you when you wake up, How is awesome is that?

 First thing first, xur is located in the DJ room. Where is that you may ask? It's very simple to get to. All you have to do is go to the tower hangar follow the hallway, take a left. Go down the stairs, all the way to the back of the room. There will stand Xur.

This week xur did not bring a weapon again, he is kind of making this a habit. but he did bring a new helmet for the Titan and year two helmets for both the warlock and hunter. Here is the infomation your searching for. Please be sure to subscribe to my youtube video below, and follow my blog for up to date information on Xur, and other Destiny information.

Ok here are the items that Xur has this Friday

Empryean Bellicose NEW yr2 (Titan Helmet) Requires level 40 with 280 defense 

*Intellect 34/49 and Discipline 33/48

* Aiming weapons while airborne holds you in place with full super, orbs recharge melee.

*More super energy from non-guardian kills 

*Shields start recovery immediately 

13 strange coins 

Mask of the third man year 2 (Hunter helmet) requires level 40 with 280 defense 

*intellect 32/47 and Strength 32/47

*Arc Blade attacks use less super energy 

*More super energy from Non - guardian kills 

*Replenish health when you pick up an orb

13 strange coins 

Skull of dire ahamkara year 2 (Warlock helmet) Requires level 40 w/280 defense 

* Strength 64/79 does have the option to increase discipline 

*Take reduce damage while using Nova Bomb improved siphon abilities 

*Gain bonus melee energy on orb pick ups

13 strange coins 

Exotic Engram (Body Armor) 19 strange coins 

Legacy Engram (weapon year 1) 31 strange coins 

Glass Needle  3 strange coins, 3 Motes of light, 1 exotic Shard

Three of coins 7 strange coins 

5 Heavy Ammo for 3 strange coins 

This information was taken directly off of my playstation in the xur screen the listing of perks is not in my own words, 

Xur Day 10-16-15

  Good Morning and happy Friday everyone. So this week not only did bungie get us emotes and free silver coins to buy them, but they also sent xur with some pretty good products. have no complaints, for the first time in the last couple of weeks I'm not disappointed at the fact that I stayed up half the night for xur to come. So I am going to happily report to you what he has :-)


  So, to start this blog you need to know where xur's location is. He is down by the cruicible guys like your going to the vanguard room. He will be on the Left hand side when you walk in.

This week Xur did come with a gun for the year 2, and some classics that we had last year but were also brought to year 2 as well. 

No back up plans year 2 - Titan Gauntlets (requires level 40 with 280 defense) 

*Intellect 30/43

*Strength 31/44

Comes with a twist of fate perk (Glass needles are required) 

* Shotgun kills trigger force barrier and force barriers duration is increased 

*increased Melee attack speed 

*Increased reload speed with shotguns 

Cost - 13 Strange coins 

Don't Touch Me year 2 - Hunter Gauntlets (requires level 40 w/280 defense)

*Discipline 30/40

Strength 29/42

*Comes with twist of fate perk (Glass needles are required) 

*Taking damage from a melee attack makes you briefly invisible

*Increased melee attack speed 

*Increased reload speed with hand cannons

Cost - 13 Strange coins 

The Stag (New )-Warlock Helmet (requires level 40 w/280 defense)

*Discipline 34/49

*Strength 31/46

*comes with twist of fate perk (Glass needles required) 

*Once per life, fast super charge when all teammates die. Chance to spawn with overshield

*Gain bonus super energy from melee kills on minions of the darkness 

*Gain bonus melee energy on orb pick ups 

Cost - 13 Strange coins 

Weapon  Year 2 

Hereafter Sniper with Arc Damage level 40 required with 280 defense

*Crouching increases scope zoom and makes it easier to aim under fire 

*Precision kills with this weapon have the chance to cause a bright flash that can blind nearby enemies 

*Magazine is refunded if all shots fired are precision kills

NEW ITEM! 

Glass needles is a item you can use to change up your perks on your year 2 armor. It is called twist of fate, it came out with this last major update on Tuesday. In oder to get some of the glass needles you can buy it from xur for 

3 strange coins 

3 motes of light

1 exotic shard 

Of course you have the Three of coins and heavy this week, along with a year one exotic weapon engram.

Hope everyone has a fantastic week.  Be sure to check out my youtube video and subscribe for up to date information on xur and destiny. You can also visit my twitch page. Twitch.tv/mochagirl98

All the information about perks came directly from my PS4 looking at xur. I did not use my own words, it's all Bungie :-) 

My struggle with Dysautonomia

So, as most of you already know I am a gamer, and I actually stream Destiny and enjoy streaming. but in light of dysautonomia awareness month I have decided to write a blog about dysautonomia and how it has effected me, as a gamer and a person.

  So, this blog isn't going to be as fun as the others but I have this on my mind and have decided to put it out there to help build awareness, and also to just get it out on paper. So, here is my story...

 First of all what is dysautonomia? (Dis-Auto -Know - Me - A) Well our body has several parts of the nervous system. Dysautonomia affects the autonomic or automatic nervous system. So we're talking heart, lungs, GI system, blood vessels... basically anything you don't think about using but your body requires to live. It is a malfunction of your autonomic nervous system. There are several types of dysautonomia (Dysautonomia is a umbrella term) There is POTS (Not the stuff you smoke) POTS stands for Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome, AAG (Autoimune Autonomic Ganglionopathy) Autonomic Neuropathy, Panydysautonomia, Familial Dysautonomia, Pure Autonomic Failure and many more.

I used to have a full time job, actually at one point I had like 4 jobs, I was a manager at a box retail store, I was a sign language interpreter, a director for AWANA, and even a martial arts instructor. Next question is which art and what belt? Right? Well... Let's just say I had my own dojo and it was Kokoro Taijutsu, I also took Kenpo for several years.

2006, something started happening to me, and it was very wrong. I was having all these strange symptoms and I couldn't figure out what was going on with me. I continued to push myself because my family always taught me that you go to work unless your pooping or puking. So, I would show up to work and work a 80 hour week regardless of how crappy I was feeling. By this time I was just a Assistant manager at a retail box store. That was it, but I was still working 80 hours a week. I had gone through hell and back from 2003 on. watching my grandpa die, Witnessing a suicide, seeing someone being decapitated on the side of the road because of a really bad car accident. In 2006 not only was I diagnosed with dysautonomia but, my best friend was murdered in San Leandro, CA. 7 People injured and 2 people killed at a shooting spree at a local bar. So, did get it dysautonomia from trauma I suppose that could be the reason being I did go through a lot of emotional stress for several years, but I would later find it was much, much more.

 

Tilt Table Test 

 In 2007 I was still having a rapid heartbeat, uncontrollable tremors , and I lost a ton of weight for no reason what so ever. By this time I wasn't even doing martial arts anymore. I had been work a ton of hours managing the store, and to be honest with you burying myself into my work to avoid my emotions. I have never been a emotional person, and though by this time I had already been through hell and back I wasn't dealing with my friends murder well at all. I was having nightmares and was also having work related problems as well, my boss didn't believe I was really sick and thought I was exaggerating everything which obviously I was not. My local Doctor couldn't figure out how to get this illness under control so at that point he decided to send me to the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, MN. In fact by this time they had already decided to give me a pacemaker while I was in MN. Which they actually ended up not doing. I was only supposed to be at the Mayo clinic for about 7 days, however during my Tilt table test my blood pressure dropped down to 64/0 my heart rate jumped up and all I remember after of 7 min standing was "We're loosing her". The Mayo Clinic decided to keep me a few more days to run more test on me. I had to call in to work, and by the end of the visit, it had been conformed that I did in fact did have dysautonomia. That moment my life changed forever. I would return back to work with a confirmed diagnoses and from there would try to lead a life of a healthy person, while being so sick sometimes I wasn't even able to stand. I would constantly have to prove that my illness was legit and that I wasn't being lazy at work. I would continue to work 80 hours a week with the same expectations as when I was healthy with very little empathy from anyone. The fact was I looked healthy, I didn't look sick, and when people look healthy they are treated as if they are healthy. The illness is much deeper than appearance. Dysautonomia is actually compared to congestive heart failure. So, as you can probably imagine I wasn't feeling good at all. Everyday was a challenge.

Autonomic Nervous System

 Ok, fast forward to 2012, I am still working as an Assistant manager, same store, different managers, different people. I had kept a form about dysautonomia in my file cabinet so if something were to happen to me at work, someone could get the information to the EMT. Still I was not taken seriously by the majority of my co workers, mainly my bosses. I was still a "attention seeker" My symptoms were slowly getting worst. I had now lost my ability to sweat, was unable to eat but I was gaining weight. Like I seriously went 3 Months without solid food. and was still working 80 hour weeks. Like no lie, I would sometimes pray that I would pass out at work so that I would be believed, and get the medical help I needed. The Doctors knew I had dysautonomia it had been confirmed by several Doctors at this point. Treatment, not really known, and it was still believed that I would grow out of it. Then I started getting so sick, couldn't keep the little bit of food down, started feeling strange sensations that I can't even explain. I then made a decision from there to go to Stanford Hospital where they had a autonomic center. Doctors who actually specialized in Dysautonomia, who actually had answers.

 While I was at Stanford I found out that not only did I have Dysautonomia I also had gastroparesis which was caused by dysautonomia. It makes sense being that Dysautonomia is basically every organ can malfunction at anytime. So basically gastroparesis is a paralyzed stomach and digestive system. My body doesn't digest food like a normal person. It has a extremely slow delayed empty. So, what is gastroparesis like? Well remember the last time you had food poisoning, or even the stomach flu. It basically feels like that, except it doesn't go away. It may reside for a little while but in the back of your mind you know that it will be back, you just don't know when. Fortunately, I am overweight and my gastroparesis is not severe. I am able to eat, sometimes it's painful to eat, and sometimes I have severe consequences of eating but I don't have a feeding tube, and I'm not worried about losing to much weight because with me, I gained weight with the dysautonomia and gastroparesis. Most people lose weight, and they are accused of eating disorders because they are so thin. The fact is they want to eat, they miss solid foods. They just can't so they are stuck with lot's of hospital visits, feeding tubes and many other things that are just unpleasant.  Now with gastroparesis you are at risk of having bowl blockages because your food isn't digesting. As unpleasant as it is to talk about these things I want you to just imagine. Having to poop, and finding the food you ate still whole, undigested in your poop. We're talking meats, veggies, fruits... Well because we don't digest those foods properly, we get constipated and well sometimes it will cause a blockage which can be life threating. It's very unpleasent and many people with Dysautonomia such as myself also have gastroparesis.

   Stanford ran more autonomic testing on me and found that my dysautonomia had worsen since my 2007 test at the Mayo clinic. By this time I was taken trips to Stanford every 6 Months and had been pulled out of work several times, because my symptoms were just to much to ignore. On Daily basis, I was constantly nauseas, couldn't keep anything down, dehydrated, had light and noise sensitivity, anxiety, my left eye wasn't dialating or constricting normally it was sluggish. I was turning blue, like dark blue especially my hands. My hands were ice cold like I've been in the freezer and then all of sudden they would turn bright bright red, and be burning hot and swollen. Which would eventually even spread to my face. I couldn't eat without being close to a bathroom, I was always dizzy, had tachycardia (A really fast heart rate) really low blood pressure, couldn't concentrate , couldn't sleep, always felt as if I was going to pass out at any moment, was short of breath, even at times had a hard time swallowing. I was always cold in fact I couldn't differentiate the temperature, in fact I lost the ability to sweat. It could be 100 degrees outside and I wouldn't be able to feel the heat nor could I sweat. So I would literally have to drench my clothes in water to cool down. I had major blood pooling one leg would be pale white, the other dark red.  The joke between my friends and I were I was so patriotic that I turned red, white, and blue all in 10 min. The strangest symptom of all was nerve damage in my tongue. Yeah, so it feels like I drank a hot cup of coffee and burned my tongue except that pain doesn't go away. Sometimes it actually intensifies. The Doctor decided that I did not just have POTS as he originally thought, and that it wasn't something I was going to grow out of. In fact, it was of autoimmune etiology. (By the way though I was on several leave of absences I was still working over 50 hours a week as a manager) This was the turning point for me. The disease had gotten so bad that not only did I always feel horrible but I was told that I should consider getting a scooter to help me get around. They ran some blood test on me and found out that my Neuroneoplastic numbers were high and they feared that I had a disease called Amylodosis. Amyloidosis is a rare disease, and it's fatal if not caught soon enough. It is in the same category as lymphoma. The average prognosis is about 10 years and it is a very painful death. The few survivors have to go through organ transplants, chemo therapy, bone borrow transplants. It's a nasty, nasty disease. So, within a few Months I went back to Stanford to run test to see if this was the cause of the dysautonomia.


   I will never forget I was at work, already having a bad day not feeling well at all. I receive this phone call from Stanford. I stepped into a office where I knew for a fact I wouldn't be interrupted when taking the call. I kept the lights off so nobody even knew I was in there. It was around 7pm and it was the Neurologist. he said "I believe you have amyloidosis, you need to make an appointment with the amyloidosis center and if you want to quit work I will sign you off." My heart sunk... I was at work in a office alone, and I was just told I'm dying...The strange thing is at that moment your not scared so much, your worried about your family, your friends, how your going to tell people. I remember asking myself if I was going to let my co workers know. I mean the whole management team knew I was sick but my people (The majority of them) Did not know.  I was taught as a leader you don't show weakness, and being sick, well that is obviously a weakness so it had always kind of been need to know basis. What do I tell them? What do I tell my parents? Do I quit my job or keep going? Should I right my will and get all that in order so that my family would be taken care of? Who's going to take care of my dog? I was numb and in shock, and while all this is running through my head I'm being called to several areas of the store. Instead I chose to ignore the calls and find my boss, I had to tell someone I had to say it out loud. I was shook up, bad and couldn't hid it like I was supposed to. That day sucked bad - Nothing like looking death in the face, and being forced to fight the fear of death while everyone is coming to you about their problems. After I talked to my boss I shook it off and acted like nothing happened and finished my shift came home and broke the news to my family. Hardest thing I have ever had to do.

    I made a appointment with the amyloidosis center at Stanford, and was told that it was a misdiagnosis, but my neurologist was certain I had it. So, I went through the testing again. This time I waited 3 Months for the test results. So for 4-5 Months I thought I was dying and I continued to work around 50 hours a week. I had slowed down a bit, after finding out that my disease was progressing. About this time it was around Christmas, and let me tell you. When your a manager and your in retail during Christmas season; well it's not easy to begin with, you throw in the fact that you only have 10 years to live which remains in the back of your mind always it's nearly impossible to stay positive and put on a good front. Somehow I held my composure through all of this, there were a few times I wasn't the nicest manager, I was smart mouth, and I made mistakes but under the circumstances I kept it together.. In November I finally got the phone call I was waiting for, it was a misdiagnosis, a major scare, I didn't have amylodosis but I still had autoimmune dysautonomia. The dysautonomia was still progressing but the good news was I wasn't going to die from amyloidosis so I wouldn't have to under go Organ transplants, or even a bone barrow transplant.

 I continued to work, I was under going IV fluids weekly at the local hospital, I had changed up my medications. I still felt horrible, my tongue was still burning. In Fact the nerve damage was spreading to my face. I was having stroke like symptoms that were scary. But I had learned to live with it, my ability to stand was lessoning but I continued to fight through this everyday all day. I made a personal decision not to tell the store what was going on with me. I did however tell my bosses so that they understood why I was so stand offish. But, at the time I didn't want to be treated any different, and I certainly didn't want a pity party. I would suck it up and fight to keep working for as long as my body would allow.

 April 2014 I got bronchitis, it was inventory so I worked through it by May 1, 2014 I was so sick that my doctor basically told me that I could continue to work and possibly die, or I can be taken out of work so I can get better. But it would be a long recovery. By Mid May I couldn't even sit, and I had to have a care taker because I was unable to take care of myself. At some points I even had to use a wheelchair to get around. May 1st was the last day I worked, I have not been able to return to work because of my dysautonomia, it is to severe to work. I can sit around 4 hours stand around 20 minutes on a good day.

 So, more or less I went from a successful manager with potential to a disabled gamer. I started gaming because it help keep my mind off of my problems. I've been a musician all my life but even music wasn't helping me escape my reality. My best friend bought me a Ps4 for Christmas to help with my adjustment of being a full time worker to being disabled and unable to work. This is when I got into Destiny. My Disease does not define me, but it has made me who I am. I look at life a lot differently because of the trials that I have gone through. I realize that everytime I go through rough times it will make me stronger at the end. I would have not been able to get through these hard times with out God, my family and my friends.  They have been my backbone, even my co workers who didn't know I was sick until I was instantly pulled out of work have been amazing and completely understanding about my situation. (Even though I didn't get the chance to say good bye)

  For about 4 Months I underwent IVIG treatments (Intravenous Immunoglobulin) Which is actually a blood product used to treat autoimmune disease. Where my progress was transient my numbers were not changing so I was taken off of the IVIG treatments. So currently I am undergoing a very mild chemotherapy. I'm exhausted most of the time, but I have notice when I don't do the treatment I do in fact feel worst than when I actually do take it.

 So, dysautonomia is a ugly disease, it steals your life from you, it forces you to face fears that you've never wanted to face, forces you to undergo lot's of painful, annoying test. Forces you to swollow your pride and ask for help. Forces you to give up your old like and accept your new normal. You become sensitive when you think people think your faking your illness, because you've been accused of it so many times because it is a invisible illness. But I am here to tell you... This is real, it's not fake, people like me do fight these diseases. We don't expect you to understand, heck most doctors don't understand. We just want your friendship, your love, and we want to be treated normally. Trust me when I say it is depressing to go from being young and active to disabled, and having a body that is completely unpredictable.

 So, if I don't post for a while, or I don't stream for a while, please know I have not given up on the stream and I do love talking to my viewers. The fact is sometimes it takes a lot of energy just to turn on the playstation and interact. So, if I'm not streaming like I haven't been this last week, it most likely because I am not feeling well. I do love my readers and viewers though. I'm gonna end this blog with a poem I wrote a while ago, hope you enjoy and thank you much for reading my blog!

You stole my life from Me 

I was once young and able

Did Martial Arts full of life and goals 

My life had become pretty stable 

You stole my life from me 

I am no longer free 

instead I am on my knees begging please let me be

I had my life planned out, and my goals set 

I hung out with my friends 

but who would have bet? 

You stole my life from me

I have no energy, and lost my ability

my friends have moved on, in fact I have more enemies 

I was young with a good career, everything was fine and clear

My future was sure to be full and pleasurable

I was motivated and ready to take on the world 

You stole my life from me 

What was my future is a faded dream 

a glimpse of what could have been

You stole my life from me 

My future is now a mystery 

I have no clue what is in store for me

This has become very scary 

I built my skills around my career

I worked on my expertise 

I focused on the things I would need to succeed

You stole my life from me

I’m not sure what I had in my head 

I should have planned instead 

Don’t put all your eggs in one basket my mom once said

You stole my life from me 

but one day I will be free 

I will succeed

and not allow you to defeat me 

Your just a diversion 

a stepping stone to my next chapter in life.

I will not allow you to steal my life from me!

Jennifer Barnard 2014

Xur 10-2-15 and paying respects to UCC families and students

  Another Friday and another day of waiting patiently for the agent of the nine. What will xur have today? but while I'm waiting for xur I just want to pay my respect to those who lost their lives yesterday at Umpqua community college in Roseburg, Oregon. Yesterday was not only a tragic day for the US but a tragic day for Oregon. If your not aware 15 people lost there life 7 injured in a mass shooting at the college. Nobody knows the motives, they just know that he called all Christians to stand up and he shot them in the head. Now without going into politics because this is meant to be a fun blog, which is kind of hard for me to do under these circumstances, I just wanted to take a moment to recognize the victims and their families and let them know that they are in my prayers. I try to keep politics and current events out of my blogs but, this is really close to home so it is bothering me. Roseburg stay strong America is behind you.

 Ok back to Xur, I'm still waiting is he going to bring the invective or maybe the fourth horseman? 2nd year? I personally would be happy with either one. As long as it's not the hawkmoon or the montecarlo.


Where is Xur located?

 Xur is located over by the speaker to the right

 Legacy Engram - This cost 31 strange coins and what it gets you is a year one exotic weapon. Unless you have not gotten The Taken King I highly suggest you don't buy this unless you want to fill your Friday Morning with disappointment. I am personally disappointed that Xur didn't bring a year 2 weapon to the table.

Immolation Fist (Titan gauntlets) 280 defense Intellect 32/45, Strength 27/40
      *Grants explosive pyre
      *increased Melee attack Speed
      *Increased reload speed with hand cannons
        (13 strange coins)

 Celestial nighthawk (Hunter Helmet) 280 defense intellect 35/50, Strength 36/51
      * Golden gun fires one shot with 6x damage, while granting keyhole for over penetration
      * Gain bonus super energy on grenade kills
      * Bonus grenade energy on orb pickup
         (13 strange coins)

 Heart of the praxic fire (Warlock chest) 280 defense Intellect 43/63, discipline 45/65
     * When radiance is active, increased agility and decreased ability cooldowns
     * Increases the amount of the scout rifel ammunition you can carry
     * Reduces incoming void burn damage
       (13 strange coins)

  Also 3 of coins is 7 strange coins for 5 of them which gives you more of a chance to have a exotic drop but  they have taken away the glitch where you can go into a certain story and kill the boss and yourself at the same time. Sorry guys it sucks I know but at least xur is selling it and you still have a chance. Your have a greater chance of getting a exotic drop on a strike though.

and also as I have stated before they have reduced the amount of heavy you can buy you only get 3 heavy's instead of 5 for one strange coin.


All the information I got is directly from Xur, the weapon descriptions are not my own I got them directly from Xur.

Xur 9-25-15

So, last week I was pleasantly surprised with what xur had, and so was most of the destiny fans apparently. Bungie stated that xur was happy too. Ok, then Bungie can we get the hint now? We don't want junk...Don't give us year one stuff and please don't give us useless stuff that nobody wants. Follow supply and demand and people will spend their strange coins. What a concept, economics 101....

 Ok, enough of that, what is xur going to have,?I am sitting here patiently waiting to find out so I can get this information out to you as quickly as I can,Why? Because I value my fans and readers :-).


 So first of all xur is located in the tower hanger on the right hand side.

Weapon exotic engram - 31 coins (Year one, unless you don't have the taken king don't waste your coins or time on this one)

Ruin wings Gauntlets yr 2 (Titan)  must be a level 40 intellect 32/45, Strength 28/45 280 defense
      * Heavy ammo drops more often, and contains more ammo in each drop
      * Increased reload speed with rocket launchers
      * Increased grenade throw distance
        Cost 13 strange coins

Sealed Ahamkara grasps gauntlets yr 2 (Hunter) Must be level 40 Strength 57/70 280 defense
      * Gain additional melee charge, and melee damage may reload primary weapon
      * Increased melee attack speed
      * increased reload speed with fusion rifle
      Cost 13 strange coins

Light Beyond Nemesis helmet yr 2  (warlock) Must be level 40 intellect 60/75 280 defense
      * Supers generate an extra orb, revive and be revived faster
      * More super energy from non-guardian kills
      * Gain bonus melee energy on orb pickups
       Cost 13 coins

Hawkmoon Hand Cannon year 2 - requires level 40 280 defense
      *Two more random bullets in your magazine deal considerable bonus damage
      * One random bullet in the magazine causes considerable bonus damage
 This gun is awesome for PVP and has become one of the PS4 players most wanted guns. It is now available for xbox. I highly suggest this gun.
       Cost 23 coins

3 of coins are still cost 7 coins but the glitch has been fixed you can no longer run seige of winter and kill the boss and yourself at the same time and have a high chance of getting the exotic engram. Your best chance will be when your running strikes.

Also the heavy ammo has been decreased to 3 for 1 coin instead of 5 for 1 coin.

All the information regarding what the armor and weapons do was taken off the playstation directly from xur it is not from my own words.

Hope you guys have a great week, and come back next week to see what xur has to save you some time.

        Mochagirl98

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What is xur selling 9-18-2014?

 So here is the big question for today, what is xur selling? Will he sell some of the new exotics? Or will he sell the same junk that we have been getting week after week? I'm looking forward to finding out what kind of new exotics are coming out. What new features we are going to be able to look forward too. What new items will xur sell, where I can actually spending my rusty strange coins instead of continuing to save them in my vault, hoping one day that I can spend it on that special exotic that nobody has.

   Xur was not a let down for a change, in fact he actually changed the format a little bit. Now you have two engrams a weapon and a helmet. So, it's a bit of a gamble what you are going to get as far as helmets and weapons go. However, from what I have heard the weapon exotic which is a bit expensive is a old school year one weapons.

So, are you ready to find out what he has? Well, are you? Well first of all he is by the speaker and the shader kiosks,

  Legacy Engram - Heavy weapon Engram (31 coins)

 An Insurmountable skullfort helmet year 2 (Titan) Must be level 40 (Strength 63/78) 280 defense
          * Gain an additional melee charge
          * Gain bonus super energy from melee kills on Minions of the darkness
          * Gain bonus melee energy on orb pickups
              (13 coins) 

Young Ahamkara's spine year 2 (Hunter) Must be level 40 (Discipline 32/45 Strength 27/40)
 280 Defense
          * Increased Tripmine grenade duration gain an additional tripmine grenade charge
          * Increased reload speed with hand cannons
          *Increased grenade throw distance
           (13 coins) 

The impossible Machines year 2 (Warlock) (NEW) Strength 50/63 - 280 defense
          *Grants landfall
          *Increased reload speed with pulse rifles
          * Increased reload speed with pulse rifles
           (13 coins) 

Exotic Engram helmet (19 coins) 

New item - Three of coins (Consumable) - This is a stackable effect that increases the chances the next Ultra you defeat will drop an exotic engram. (7 coins) 



All the information is taken directly off of the game and is not in my own words, except for the review above

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Assessment of The Taken King

So, it has been over 24 hours since the taken king has been out. I managed to defeat orx within 4 hours. Now most people who read this will probably think that this article is anti - destiny or the new DLC because I was able to get through the levels so quickly. however I really have nothing but good things to say about this new DLC so far. No grant it I still need to do the strikes, and I also need to do the raid which will not be released until Friday. But this is what I think thus far. 

The Taken King is just what Destiny needed. The game had always had great graphics and reputation because they are the ones who created halo. However the story lacked. There was a lot of information missing that you had to research. You had Grimmor cards but who is going to go through 3500 cards to get information on a game that your playing? Shouldn't it already be in the game? Shouldn't you not have to do extra research on a game that you've already spent a ton of money on not to mention time? Destiny is a very addictive and time consuming game. So, after spending hours on getting the best gear and weapons who is going to take hours and read a bunch of cards? 

From what I have seen Destiny has gone in the right direction to fix the lack of story. without any spoilers Destiny covered more story in the first 5 minutes of the taken king than they did in Destiny Vanilla, The Dark below, and the house of wolves. The story is intense and you can't wait to finish the next level to get more information on the story. So yes the story mode is relatively short but it is intense and not lacking story. Destiny also put in a feature where your ghost can scan items and give you the background on those items regarding on how they fit in the story, if you wish to find out. 

Another awesome feature that they have added is your ghost can help you find spirit bloom, relic iron, and spinmetal. Now if your like me, I was thinking I have enough of all of this stuff I don't need to find anymore of it. Well this is not true because the Taken King forces you to basically start your character over. Your maximum level is 40 but your light level does go above 170 which is the max of our armor and guns right? Wrong... You end up looking for new, better armor and new better guns. 

Overall the Taken King is a fun addition to Destiny, and if you have the money I think you should give it a spin. :-)